I haven't felt like blogging lately

Sorry for my absence. I haven't felt like blogging lately and I've been far to busy at work to attempt to either. Lots of things have been going on lately...recently Daughter H has felt like she wants to die. She's made no attempts but she had me scared last week. I know exactly where she's coming from because I've felt like I'd like to leave this planet several times myself but I'm weak...I could never do anything like that. I'd be too worried about how it would effect my family. She seem to think that if she and Grandson A weren't around anymore that all would be good in the family and my bills would cease to exist. I don't know why she thinks if she leaves us, my light bill would drop dramatically but that is her way of thinking. I talked to her for a long time and found out what was really bothering her and it was partly money but guilt was the main cause. I won't go into details but I think she's feeling much better now and won't do anything drastic before she consults with me again and we do things to prevent her from feeling this way. She may need to be on some anti-depressants for awhile but for the time being, she's doing ok. I told her that if she died, that a part of Son J and I would also die. I also told her that we're doing a lot better financially than others...it could be a helluva lot worse...don't worry about me. I always seem to pull out of tight jams somehow or another. I think she also hates her job and who can blame her? I wouldn't want to work as a waitress at a strip club either. All is strip club is, is a glorified whorehouse. I don't care what anyone says in their favor either. I've known lots of women that have had to work at them and all will tell you the same. Sure there are better ones than others but they're all still the same. I could never degrade myself in the way that some women do who work there but that's just me. I'd have to be a heroin addict in need of a fix before I could deal with drunk men staring and/or drooling at me every night of my life. They probably would drool at me anyway... (come on, I know that made you smile) I'll try to blog more often and let the world know that I'm fucked up so they don't have to feel all alone in this fucked up world. Later...